Chemo Treatment 2 of 12

Well.
Got thru another day.
No fun to go thru this.
Was grateful for the anti-nausea medicine being pumped in after the benadryl.
Only 1 of 3 meds today.
My life coach suggested I dig deep to find things that will bring me to the clinic every week. My things for this week were: audiobook of Mary Poppins- laughing, time with husband and son afterwards- anticipation, chatting with friends and ride home with friend- support, and expectation that things will hit Monday and Tuesday - hope for an ok weekend. I got there.

My friend told me that this might be an easier week since it was only 1 med but the cumulative effects will slowly make my 'bad' days worse - Monday/Tuesday. So I'll take that anti-nausea medicine quick and early and take it easy as I should.
It was only 4 hours at my oncologist's office vs 7, that was not pleasant at all but ok.
This is the week that hair might start coming out. Oh boy. At least I have many scarves, hats, and such to entertain me once I get it shaved off.
I know it is odd but I'm filling my days. I really miss work. Really miss students. Really miss connections to my colleagues. It isn't fun. I'm enjoying reading when my concentration is there. Enjoying watching shows which I don't have to work too hard at.

I'm turning 41 this Thursday. Oh boy. Turning 40 wasn't great since I had my radical hysterectomy on that day... 41? Chemo treatment effects. Grateful to be here. Grateful to have this chance to celebrate life and be with family and friends but boy, wouldn't mind that future 42 birthday being just a little easier. For me, for my family, and my friends...
A friend who is struggling for a terribly different reason posted on Facebook today something that resonated with me:

"Dear whatever doesn't kill me,
I'm strong enough now.
Thanks!"

Found the ecard of it:

I'm not down emotionally right now, actually feeling pretty positive on the day of treatment. Got to go out with my husband and son, try out a new restaurant, wander thru a few shops, pick up craft supplies at the Hong Kong version of a dollar store, and relax with a few shows with my husband tonight. Almost felt like a typical relaxing Saturday afternoon to be honest. I enjoyed every moment, even when my son and I argued over silly things and I had to apologize to my husband about being a grouch this morning when he didn't read my mind. Yes. I was angry and snappy that he didn't read my mind. I'm not a morning person in the first place. Add heading off to chemotherapy and I'm not a fun person to be around, even when I'm trying my best. Poor guy was just in his own world and not worried about me, which he shouldn't have to be 24x7. But talking it out this evening for a few minutes cleared the air, gotta talk things out!!

I went thru a few 'damn it' moments this past week. One was during pre-chemo treatment today when I found out I lost 2 more pounds. Seriously. I'm really eating a LOT and packing it in. Even ate a mini-carton of Happy Cow Coconut Vanilla ice cream tonight... But I'm still losing weight. Damn cancer. My oncologist isn't happy but told me it is normal to lose weight and to "eat". Seriously. I'm freaking eating. Even added in chicken this week which was weird to have back in my diet- treated it as an appetizer as I planned... and I added in bone soup thanks to a friend's generous sharing... My acupuncturist told me to try to drink a cup of it every day. Will try!
The other 'damn it' moment was dealing with the public hospital system for the first time. Good thing- I know what to expect now. Bad thing- I know what to expect now. Blech. I already dislike waiting, and I do have to wait a lot lately. But waiting in an uncomfortable chair, wearing a face mask, seeing 30 other cancer patients, and waiting for 2 hours and 45 minutes wasn't a thrill. The oncologist I met was knowledgeable and plenty experienced and told me that I'm a pretty special case. Yes, special, that's me, I go above and beyond. He said that he wanted me to continue to do chemotherapy through my private doctor so that we didn't interrupt the protocols already set in motion. (Ok) Then he scheduled a follow up appointment in November - scheduled for 10am but he told me to bring my lunch and expect to see him around 2-3pm, seriously!!- to see how I'm doing and whether I qualify for getting radiation through the public system. Basically, he's worried about radiation so close to where I already had it for my breast cancer treatment- me too! But as my wonderful husband said to the doctor when he said this, "Whatever it takes."

Living with Metastatic Breast Cancer - I know I don't have this but it is one of the closest things I can find to what I'm going thru since I'm such a "special" case... Appreciated this video:

And now... moving on. Day by day my friends. THANK YOU for all the support. Grateful. Grateful. Grateful...

Health- More Alternative Practices and Music

Note- I wrote this part 2 weeks ago! Just wasn't ready to share it, but loved every minute and have thought about this interview many times since:
I appreciated listening to this interview with Rae Leung by my wise friend Reenita who has written numerous books on Ayurvedic medicine and also a fantastic young adult book called Operation Mom that I thoroughly enjoyed and recommend to others.
http://podcast.rthk.hk/podcast/item_epi.php?pid=363&lang=en-US&id=38781

http://podcast.rthk.hk/podcast/item_epi.php?pid=363&lang=en-US&id=38976

Not only did I appreciate the interview but I also enjoyed the music that was mixed throughout the interview. Powerful thoughts and messages. I found that much of what Rae Leung, the person interviewed, had to say about her Cancer journey were things I agreed with... It was interesting to hear more about how she went to try out Bioresonance and Tapping/EFT. Interesting. Heartbreaking. Understandable.
*Loved that her #1 lesson was to learn how to be more patient... I really can appreciate this.
Learned about how she ran a project here a few years ago in Hong Kong: http://www.raerity.com/CWord/CWord.html - Looks interesting.
"When I look at cancer, I don't want to think of it as a battle, because that puts us in a combative mode every day. That creates too much stress, too much anxiety. Just to psych ourselves up for a fight every day? Then we're constantly struggling. And I don't feel like I'm struggling at all... I don't see it as a battle. I see it as an existence... And that's where I see pain can creep in and negative stressful signals can creep in..." - powerful reflection to think on.

India Arie - I am not my hair:

Melissa Ethridge - I run for life:

I sat back and looked into a few things this week. 

I am appreciating this Jewish Mindfulness Program:

https://mishkan.org/elul-week-three-forgiving-ourselves-forgiving-others

I looked into Tapping or EFT/Emotional Freedom Technique. Interesting practice. Going to see what works, fits, feels right. My good friend, cancer survivor, told me tapping really helped her deal with chemotherapy and the side effects. Think I haven't formed this as a routine yet.

Also looking further into Qigong, I need breathing exercises... must retrain my lung! (Since I wrote this, I've had two qigong sessions by a talented, thoughtful instructor at my apartment, really is a good practice, well worth the time and routine to get into.)

Finally, present day:
Every day in the morning I wake up dying to drink water... but I stop myself. I go into the bathroom and dump 2 teaspoons of coconut oil in my mouth and do 10-15 minutes of pulling. It should be more like 20 minutes but that just doesn't work out quite right yet. Then I do my swishing/gargling from the doctor- a mix of sea salt and baking soda. Plus many report that their teeth deteriorate with chemo so if pulling helps? Heck yeah, I'll do it. No fun but part of my routine. Anything I can to prevent mouth/lip/throat sores, the better. I then drink squeezed lemon in warm water with my chinese herbal medicine... every morning. There's other routines I'll share on another day.
Never heard of pulling before? You're not alone. It was new to me...
Here's a little info on it:
http://authoritynutrition.com/oil-pulling-coconut-oil/

http://edition.cnn.com/2014/08/06/health/oil-pulling/

Pulling- Months ago I asked my dentist his opinion and he said, go for it, it doesn't hurt but I don't personally believe it helps much either. So... going for it.
Happy New Year to my friends celebrating Rosh Hashanah! I wasn't at services this year but took time to reflect upon the year and appreciate all the good things that have happened. Important to do!

Perhaps oversharing?

Warning: This specific post isn't for those who are reading to check up on me. This is for those who don't mind a woman oversharing and complaining a smidge... maybe more than a smidge. Men... not exactly for you. My poor husband has heard it all and feels sorry for me, but that's part of his life with me, the oversharer... spare yourselves...

So, for a while now I've been thinking about nursing my son. I'm sure that's what others think about when they're dealing with the aftermath of operation effects and chemotherapy, right? No?
Well... here I go with sharing too much x 2 today.

So, nursing. I was one of those smarties. I thought to myself, "I've nursed my son for 16 months, I'm preventing any chance of breast cancer, woo hoo!" (little did I know 8 years later...)
Eight years later when I received my first diagnosis (cervical cancer) my first thought was, "Thank god my son is already here." well, maybe not my first thought... but I was so grateful my husband and I already had a happy, healthy child. So grateful.

So, for those moms who have nursed their children, do you remember when your boobs felt heavy, ready to pump or nurse? And do you remember ever feeling that for more than an hour? two hours? As teachers, some of us have that challenge of the "must pump!!" moment but you still have 3 classes in a row you must teach first.

Hmm.
So, why the heck is my mind backtracking eight years?
Because for the past stinking month, my right boob has felt like it was crazy engorged. To that point where I'm ready to scream "OW!!!" Well, sometimes I do yelp... I think it is a combo of a few things:
1. Lymph node removal- drainage is screwed now
2. Surgeon who removed my lower right lung cut into the underside of my breast to get to the lung (think that's the camera incision), also he cut a long incision across and almost into my breast for the lung removal portion (I think). The scars are healing but still a bit painful sometimes. Quit taking tylenol/panedol a week ago. That poor breast didn't need to be cut into more than it already had with the lumpectomy.
3. Radiation- this poor boob had already been thru enough in May when I went in for round after round of radiation. Poor thing doesn't know what end is up. My oncologist offered anti-inflammatory. No. I was taking that and nothing happened with the breast... nice thought though. He's told me "wear sports and supportive bras"... certainly am during daytime hours, made the mistake once of not, OWWWW.

So I walk around with what I describe as an engorged, painful breast in addition to the center of my chest burning with pain (assuming it is the cancer/healing from lymph node removal)... in addition to feeling scar tissue form... oy. I feel very lopsided when I look in the mirror. I've asked a few poor girlfriends if they can see a difference when they visited. They said "well, now that you've pointed it out..." - hah. I share too much sometimes... right?
Shared too much yet?
No?
Well here goes more then...

I'm going on goodness knows how much sleep today. I'm exhausted. Last night I was reading myself to sleep and realized I was wide awake still at 1pm. Oops, closed the book. Tried breathing, counting, peaceful thoughts. Nope. Opened book and continued to read. Then 2pm. Then 3pm- finished a book, LOVED it, didn't help the sleep predicament. The last time I was up ALL NIGHT was when I thought I had lice in July. Uh oh. Jumped up in realization at 4am. Sprayed my hair with these healthy oil stuff and combed my hair for 45 minutes squinting, looking, and checking- repeat times goodness knows how many. Blech. Really made me appreciate the short haircut. Nope, no lice. Yuck. BUT my scalp was freaking out. So itchy. Not sure if it is because my hair is curling back in as it grows a little bit and making it itchy when I lay down on it?? Not certain at all. But I was freaked out. IE no sleep. Thank goodness I brought back to Hong Kong the stuff that could immediately provide me with peace of mind. Yuck. Plus... my hair is falling out. Not clumps. But I'm pretty sure more than the 50-100 strands that can fall out daily- but of course it is more visible in some ways now since it is shorter. Hmm. Chilling out and enjoying hair while it is there... short and easy.

So, I'm done with my oversharing for the day.
I already went to my acupuncturist today. He worked on some energy healing and refocusing of my mind = redirecting from worry to letting go. Appreciated it but basketcase/exhausted one that I am... he made me cry- which is ok. I'm also trying his herbs, shall see. Will show ingredients to my oncologist but my oncologist already gave his approval for herbal medicine for a different Chinese medicine practitioner... so I'm not as concerned about that than I am all these other vitamins/herbs I have to bring in the list of and get permission for before I begin taking them.

I am going with wonderful husband to the local hospital today as well. Letting go of worries and concerns that are out of my control. Shall see how this appointment goes.
Thanks for bearing with me... To those that thought that I overshared, sigh. I warned, right? #gototopofpostandadddisclaimernow

Chemo Reaction- A little documenting

Hope...
for future patients: preventing metastisis- which I'm presently dealing with:
http://www.businessinsider.com/scientists-cancer-spread-health-research-2014-9

So, I realized I didn't share what happened on my chemotherapy day 1 of 12 day.
Here it goes... 7 hours long...
I checked in at my oncologist's clinic and was immediately weighed and had my temperature checked. I lost two kilos which was really upsetting. Didn't think about how I had cut all my hair since the last time I was on the scale, so perhaps some of the weight loss is from hair??
Vampire time- blood was drawn and analyzed.
I checked in with my oncologist who lectured me about losing weight, this is an ongoing conversation... and also chatted about how my blood is, told me many side effects to the chemo drugs that were going to be pumped into me, discussed other things as well. I forgot to ask why he "upgraded" me from Stage 3 to Stage 4 cancer but found out later it is because of the metastasis.

Then I went to his back room. I've had my blood drawn here so often but I always said to myself, at least I don't have to do chemotherapy. Thought that one too soon.
There are comfortable chairs there. Lounge ones... good thing too since I had to sit for 7 hours. The medicine is operated through a machine plugged into the wall. You can't walk around with it!
My wonderful friend Diane who is an incredible support came around this time... she was there the entire time, we have such fascinating conversations... So grateful she was willing to be there, funny that I brought along books and magazines, never opened them.
The nurse was so lovely. Kind. Patient.
I warned her. "I don't like needles. I have to pee a lot. I'm sorry if that creates complications." She was so easy going every time I had to go to the restroom. Just stopped the meds. Removed the line going into my hand and put a cap on the tube until I got back...
First I got a line in my left hand (which sucks, I'm left handed-- has to be that way since the breast cancer and lung cancer both are in my right side).
Then saline was pumped into me to get going.
Then a little medicine was pumped in.
And a little more...
Then around 10:30 the first chemo was pushed in.
Then around 11:30 the next chemo drug.
Then a little more medicine was pumped in. (Benadryl, etc.- only thing that made me wince, that darn medicine stings when it is going in!)
My friend Susan showed up at 1pm. She wanted to visit, bring Diane lunch, and see how I was doing... plus give me a ride home afterwards, so grateful for her time. Super supportive friend.
Then 1:00-2:30 the final chemo drug. It was fascinating to meet a lab technician I'd seen for a year working in the back room on blood analysis and find out he was a Chinese medicine doctor certified and practicing in Hong Kong. He provides his service to my oncologist's patients- herbs, acupuncture, and more... wow. I'm waiting this week to see my side effects and then checking in with him on Saturday for my next round of chemo. He helped out my friend Diane which was incredible.
I ate lunch.
I was so ready to go at 2:30 when the saline was pumped thru again.
That was when the nurse began lecturing me. For 45 minutes. Seriously. My friend pointed out that I started biting my nails during that time. Why yes, I'm sleepy, tired of being in a chair, and ready to go go go... I don't want to hear about side effects now! But for fourty-five minutes I worked hard to concentrate on all the side effects and careful practices she talked about. I thought to myself, I'm better at reading this stuff, please just give me the paper... but I listened too since she would often offer her sage advice as she went over the paperwork. Unfortunately, she forgot to give me the packet (oops) she popped it back into my file record booklet so I will probably run by the clinic this week to pick it up.

After some lectures, I decided to add organic chicken back into my food plan, just treating meat as an appetizer but doing it to get more protein... I'm eating a ton of food but losing weight. I know cancer has a lot to do with it but still, doing what I need to do. A beautiful friend dropped off chicken broth (bone soup) for me to eat... will add some brown rice noodles to it and have tomorrow. So grateful.
I also enjoyed breaking the rules and eating a piece of whole wheat bread today (gasp) with avocado and smoked salmon on it- what heaven it was to eat! So...  there's the update I didn't include in my last post.

Monday- 2 days after chemo was pumped into my veins... I'm having a harder time. Honestly, I'm fatigued, gave in and admitted I was nauseous and took pills, and didn't have as much get-up-and-go energy today. Considered it a feat to eat my meals, shower, and welcome my husband home from Vietnam. He completed the mountain marathon in 12 hours! So proud of him.
I wanted to go to this workshop in the evening after dinner and thought I had enough energy to go and return. Learned a hard lesson... I attended this essential oils workshop for around 45 minutes and realized I was done. I needed to go. So they put a drop of oil on my wrists- Joy- smelled like my grandma, lovely, and I headed out. I wasn't thinking my best. I decided to go to ride the MTR home. Figured I could find a place to sit down and it was only 3 stops. Rush hour. Dream on Debbie. So, I got there, had to stand but found a place to lean and got thru two stops. Then I blacked out/fainted. On the MTR. Many people worried. One woman helped me stand up. I slightly collapsed again and people helped me exit the MTR at my exit. The lovely woman who helped me up walked me over to the guard's station and asked me what I wanted... to call the police? Heck no. (But that's a normal thing to do here.) but I said I needed to sit down. They pulled a chair out of the station for me and for five minutes I cooled off. (Was dripping with sweat.) I then realized I didn't trust my energy level so I called my husband and he came to get me. (Welcome home honey!) I was grateful to be home, humbled, and upset. I chatted with my life coach and discussed decisions, what happened and why. We agreed it was probably a combo beyond just being exhausted- I had started wearing a face mask and felt it was suffocating me. She pointed out that breathing in my CO2 probably wasn't good. I need to practice wearing it at home for a while. I had taken the nausea medicine which can get you dizzy... And I should have taken a taxi home. Lesson learned. The hard way but at least there were wonderfully helpful people around who cared enough to get me to a safe place where I was monitored.

Have snapped a few pictures lately... figured I'd share a few. You can see the clinic and even the meds... not fun but part of my days 11 to go...

Finding inspiration, poetry, and being careful

Hmm.
Expected drama today. None. Maybe side effects from chemo are holding off for tomorrow or the next day. Odd. NOT COMPLAINING.
Felt really productive and happy today. Enjoyed visiting with some wonderful friends, had fun doing art with my kiddo, and got through the day taking rests when I felt a little fatigued. Noticed my face was flushed three times during the day (I never flush)... Hmm.
Working my way thru Crazy Sexy Cancer Tips book still, taking my time as I really am appreciating it and taking ideas to heart... and feeling reassured with things I've already done this past year. 

Funny how strong I feel when I have poison coursing through my veins and cancer cells multiplying (hopefully they're very confused and starting to die instead.)
Wrote these poems a few months ago at a writers workshop. 

Thought they still represent my thoughts about this cancer journey:

Diagnosis:

No.

No. No.

Thank god he is here with me, wouldn’t want to be the one to tell him.

Crap.

No security.

No safety.

Unsure.

Operation prep.

Leaving work.

Conversations.

Repeated conversations.

Repeating myself too many times.

Not so grateful to say I’m grateful over and over.

Happy to be alive but terrified.

Books- what do I read first?

Online Articles scare the hell out of me.

Online groups are useful.

Talking with someone is best...
Thank goodness for good friends.

  

Survive? Yes.

Thrive? Will give it a go.

Inspire? Not so sure.

Must my cancer story be so special?

Would it help or worry others to read it?

Will thinking about cancer make me worry more?

I already worry enough.

Every twinge.

Every pain.

Especially every consistent pain brings forth

an immediate worry about what could be coming.

Scans? Expensive.

Hate worrying about money.

Hate getting upset about costs.

Better to focus on outcome.

Knowledge.

Hope.

Action.
Better to focus on what I can control.

Appreciated these sites and resources - last two shared by lovely friends recently:

12 Promises You Should Make to Yourself and Keep Foreverhttp://www.marcandangel.com/2014/09/17/12-promises-you-should-make-to-yourself-and-keep-forever/

40 Ways to Create Peace of Mind
http://tinybuddha.com/blog/40-ways-to-create-peace-of-mind/

Walk in Beauty- Navajo Prayer:
http://talking-feather.com/home/walk-in-beauty-prayer-from-navajo-blessing/

Up Down Suckage

Today was one of those up/down days.
Up at 5am with a shaking dog- can't let her sleep on the bed when my husband is away!
Barely any sleep so a little more emotional and sensitive... all day.
Tomorrow is the big chemo-begins day. Been dreading it so much. Didn't help that I didn't make plans today. I made time to Skype with my parents which I enjoyed- had discussion and show and tell with the wig/hats/scarves, etc... but after that... had frustrating technology time. Wifi has been a little iffy. Will resolve sooner or later, I'm sure. Took a walk and wandered around areas of Causeway Bay which was good. Getting out of the apartment every day has always been goal one.
Received a letter from my oncologist reclassifying me as stage 4, not stage 3 which is quite upsetting for me mentally, takes me a little time to process those things... like having to have chemo every week vs. every 3 weeks... He didn't clarify this with my husband and I a week ago but I should have asked... gotta be your own advocate! So here is the official diagnosis: cancer of the cervix now with metastases to lung and mediastinal lymphatics, stage IV disease. Tomorrow- Avastin, taxol and carboplatin rounds begin. I'm going to be repeating these things tonight when I meditate and tomorrow during chemo as I remember: "I feel strengthened by the love of my friends and family." and "I can relax and let the chemotherapy work." and "Every treatment takes me another step closer towards health and recovery."
Missing wonderful husband but enjoyed Skyping with him this evening. Beautiful area at the top of a mountain in Vietnam. He pointed out to my son and I which mountains and peaks he'd be running up and down tomorrow. Still think it is wild but just so beautiful as well!
I've been getting a little down but trying to stay positive as much as I can... riding the waves day by day. Just knew today would be hard. Like pre-surgery and pre-radiation... the unknown is darn scary.
I think things are straightened out with friends, kiddo, etc. for future days. A few people will be leaned on... so many others have said, just ask, but honestly? It is hard to ask. To know to ask. To know that I need something. My best friend forced me to think about her visiting and when it would help. Forcing me think made me realize that I was quite nervous about when my husband and son are off on an adventure in Beijing in October. So, I asked if she could come then... I'm really looking forward to her visit and grateful as well. Lightens up my days and makes me hope for some good energy during treatments so that she can see fun areas of Hong Kong. Shall see. I read in Crazy Sexy Cancer in the advise for friends area that the friends that simply "do" something will be appreciated and I've noticed that those who have called and said "Ok, let's take a walk" and others that said "I'm visiting, here's a day I'm free" have really helped... Asking for anything is tremendously hard for me. I don't know why, just part of me that I'd prefer to help others vs. ask... but grateful to all who have written notes, sent messages, called, and visited... not complaining, just reflecting.
I'm excited because I signed up for a laughter yoga class like a friend recommended I go to- will be in a few weeks but will be nice to look forward to. I've been quite curious about it.
Yesterday I had my first acupuncture treatment with a new person. I appreciated his approach, reminded me of the person I went to in the US (quite a relief)... will see him next Thursday.
So...
Emotionally up, down and every which way.
I realized that this actually marks a year. A year with cancer. A year ago my world was flipped upside down. A year ago I was so relieved that the surgery went well and that I'd only have to have radiation. (surgery happened on my birthday last year, at least chemo isn't on my birthday this year... if things go well with treatment, my last one will be on my sister's birthday, shall want to dance together on Skype to celebrate...)  Little did I know that the cancer was bouncing around and into my lung and who knows where else... Can't believe I'm dealing with this all again with the financial stress, insurance worries, and more added to this mess. My husband thinks things will all work out but I admit, I'm so concerned.
I think cancer sucks majorly. It encompases too many of my thoughts. I love chatting with friends, reading, watching shows, and any distraction that takes me away from cancer a little bit. Still appreciating much humor and trying to surround myself with it as I go thru the days. I have Mrs. Doubtfire cued up to watch with my son tomorrow night, looking forward to laughing with him.
Tonight I'll return to a little more technology mess and then read some Crazy Sexy Cancer again, appreciating her attitude and tips. Probably finish off the night with some humor, starting a new book soon called People I want to Punch in the Throat by Jen Mann. Heard it is hilarious.

Ambulance, surgeons, wigs, police, and more

Presently, I'm quite glad that I have a fully booked week. It is helpful to distract myself at the present time.
I enjoyed free time yesterday in the morning with my son and husband when there was the T8 (typhoon level 8) warning hoisted. Eventually my husband had to head to work and the kiddo and I had an appt to get x-rays and sutures out at the surgeon's office.

Working on my patience:
I've noticed that my patience is wearing thin when I have to talk with medical people on the phone. It helps to remind myself that it is a short time period that I have to deal with it and "this too shall pass". Sometimes I think these complications are good for me to work on my patience skills, breathing skills, and communication skills...  Reminding myself how many people these individuals talk to is also helpful- if I'm kind/nice, will help other patients out.
For example:
On Monday afternoon, I got a call from my surgeon's office. They wanted to change my Tuesday appointment time from 3:45 to 2pm. Well, that was confusing as the appointment they wrote down for me was at 11am one week before. After sorting it out, I was grateful that the appointment was at 2pm since there was that T8 that came in and had most everything closed in the morning. They called two hours later to confirm the appointment that they called earlier about and took quite a bit of time clarifying everything, I grew impatient about this since I already talked with them two hours before about the same thing. Also, I was told to go at 1:30 to get an x-ray of my lungs done at another location. When I got there at 1:05, the office was closed for lunch from 1-2pm. I chuckled, called the surgeon's office, and was told to wait til 2 and then come over immediately after... It all works out. I was able to cross the street and hang out at a favorite bookstore and had unexpected relaxing time.

Surgeon time:
Visiting with my surgeon was ok. He's quite pleased with me and my progress and is now "done" with me. Good guy, talented surgeon. Asked me about new diagnosis and when I mentioned how my oncologist said that the chemo/radiation only had a 40-50% predicted success rate, he simply said "try to be more positive, I've seen patients like you before successfully battle cancer and live for a long time." I explained to him how I was staying darn positive but that he asked about the diagnosis and I was simply filling him in... but I appreciate his positive support. He gave me some ointment for the three scars, removed the final three sutures, and sent me away with many instructions. Really glad that he's happy with the progress and also grateful to be finished visiting yet another doctor. Must mention, I can recognize myself now by x-ray. Since that lower right lobe of my lung was taken out, my x-rays look quite odd. Interesting to see the changes already in three weeks since the surgery.

So, working on my skills, taking deep breaths and more...
Qigong:
At the end of the day I was able to have some lovely women over and have a class in Qigong, reminded me of Tai Chi with deeper breathing and energy focus. I'm so happy that this will be a weekly occurance, just wish I'd started this up years ago... Complimentary to yoga. I put a few YouTube videos with Qigong exercises on that page to the right of this blog post called Healthy Practice Videos to Visit.

I'm happy that I got preregistered for a yoga class and chanting class thru CancerLink. Those will start in October. Hope I have energy to go to them every week... will be healthy outlets I think.

So... appreciated accomplishments for the day.
Hair- I like touching it, soft and all that but when I look in the mirror I'm not so fond of it yet... but I'll adjust. Have had many supportive friends tell me how much they like it.

Insurance fun (NOT):
Today I met with my school foundation's human resources representative about insurance coverage. She was reassuring but I didn't receive any definitive answers... what a surprise. I have paperwork requests I'm setting up for back-up insurance and more. Shall see. Grateful there's someone supporting me there.

Overwhelming packages:
Received the prettiest hats and scarves in the mail today. Thank you to my lovely friend for passing them to me. Shall picture model soon enough. This afternoon I went to CancerLink to meet with the wig specialist to learn a little about wigs and also find out about how to wear scarves. I was really thrown trying on different wigs. Really thrown. Didn't recognize myself and wasn't so thrilled. But the woman was so kind and patient. I borrowed a wig... it is ok. Plus I received a nice pink hat and an odd skull covering for keeping me warm, protecting me from itchy wigs, and when my hair starts falling out I have another odd head covering that helps me avoid hair falling all over when the chemo effects begin...
Yesterday a friend also passed me her turban/scarves that were created for cancer patients. I'm happy I have multiple options, a good thing.

Began crying (crying is ok) this afternoon when a care package arrived from some of my beloved librarian friends from Beaverton, Oregon. Working with them was incredible over the years... dear friends... Really touched to receive so many special letters, treats, personalized gifts, and much more... I have many things to use for chemo treatments and many special things to boost my spirits. Really really overwhelmed by that box of special gifts, thoughts, and love.
*I just read in Crazy Sexy Cancer Tips by Kris Carr about how I should create a quiet place to go each day. She had one corner of her home with a cushion, candles, and things that inspired her... Think some of the care package gifts will be there.

Ambulance and Local Hospital Experience:
Tonight was a little tumultuous. Our live-in helper (my lifeline for almost everything) collapsed in pain after dinner, we're not sure why, and we called an ambulance. I rode with her to the hospital. She felt a little better after 45 minutes but then we waited an hour and a half before she was released... she has to go to the doctor tomorrow. I suspect she has kidney stones but also she's had other issues in the past and usually it is food related. While we waited for the ambulance to show up, my husband quickly zipped out to take our dog for a walk. He went to a local money exchange place and when he talked to the person about getting Vietnamese dong. The person tried to give him a poor exchange rate and then refused to give him back his money. He called the police and the person gave back money right before the police showed up... He filed a complaint. Our son was over at our wonderful neighbor-friends in the same apartment complex... Thank goodness we have friends to lean on that have a kiddo his age. He was happy to hang out with his friend.
I got home with my helper at 10pm. Glad she got care, medicine, and is now resting. Scary to see someone you care about in pain, curled up... Appreciate that an ambulance ride and emergency room care total $100 Hong Kong Dollars- that's $12 USD. In the US how much would it be? Crazytown costly, I know... But I didn't feel like the ER doctors were really knowledgeable. You must be your own advocate there. I noticed that my helper spoke up and got a referral letter so that she could go see a regular doctor... That was my first experience in an ambulance in Hong Kong (or ever for that matter) and also in a local hospital. I've been in four private hospitals here in Hong Kong for procedures. I tell you, drastic difference. I was quite entertained people watching for two hours- drunk people, vomiting people, broken ankle people, and more... did I mention I asked for a face mask immediately?

Marathon man:
So, why was my wonderful husband getting Vietnamese dong? He's going away! Tomorrow! For 5 days! I'm getting my first chemo treatment right in the middle of the time he's away! But I refused for him to cancel anything. He is a marathon person, one thing we'll never share beyond my support for him. He's going to Vietnam to participate in the Vietnam Mountain Marathon. Running. A marathon. In the mountains. Seriously. This is like his birthday present to himself since that's coming up the day after he returns. Curious? Here's a link to his adventure:
http://vietnammountainmarathon.com/the-challenge/
Really happy we live in a place that gives him a chance to run marathons like this. He's done marathons for a long long long time... and I admire his tenacity. Shall miss him a tremendous amount while he's gone though!

Tomorrow? Trying out a new acupuncturist. Crossing my fingers he works out for me... Have had some not-so-fabulous experiences so far here... they are expensive appointments. Want it to be worth it.

Enjoyed watching this video, interesting study: Cell Nutritionals: Pomi-T Study - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=383bzFpwJ0k