Sunday, November 30, 2014

Riding Energy Waves

Well, that last appointment with my oncologist didn't sit too well for me but oh well, not always going to go as I assume. I've certainly learned that with this journey.
Right now I'm doing math. 1+4=5 1+2+2=5  1-1 dose + 1-3 doses+ 1-1 dose+ 1-2 doses+ 1-1 dose= 5 more treatments instead of one left.
So I have the PET scan this Wednesday. My oncologist expects results back by Saturday when I have what was supposed to be my final chemo treatment. But I got more information.
If I have clear scan results, which I'm expecting but also accepting that you never know, my oncologist was pretty blatant- he said, "I hope you understand, I want you to have one more full round of treatment. This will not be as you were expecting. Instead you'll have two before your holiday and two after the holiday." Hmm. Not thrilled at all but he did say since the beginning that he expected to have four rounds of chemo and then adjusted it to three and then contingent on a clear PET scan I'd have a fourth round. I'm glad I get to escape for a while. I'm glad we planned/paid for this trip back in June before changes occurred again with this third round of dealing with cancer. Anticipating a holiday is a good distraction. Shall see how things go.
So far on Saturday after chemo I was w-i-p-e-d out. I hung out for a little bit with my family after my husband and I came back from chemo and listened to a great audiobook for a little bit and then slept and slept and slept until almost dinnertime. Then I was up-up-up until 1am with my brain in full gear. I took advantage of full brain waves by prewriting blog posts for my "baby"- The Styling Librarian blog that I've written for almost 3 years now- I started it almost 3 years ago on January 1st, 2012, a few months after that we decided Hong Kong would be our big life change. So, most of the blog I've written here in Hong Kong. I love reviewing books, interviewing authors, sharing random videos, writing about life's adventures and more... it is a good outlet and when I've prewritten posts, I'm much calmer and happier and productive. I've been a bit behind for the past few months with prewriting my posts... never have missed posting my regular things and I honestly take great pride in maintaining the blog. I am so grateful for all the connections I've made to authors, illustrators, bloggers, fellow book lovers and more. So... hooray for my stronger brain waves night that allowed me to prewrite blog posts for a while. It was a relief.
Sunday- today- has been a little odd. Sleeping in, walking the dog, missing other Sunday routines, and reading- I completed a novel, an audiobook and just finished reading an incredible non-fiction picture book as well. Plus we had a good amount of family time and watched a Star Trek flick as well... Never know how each day will go.
Thanks, as always, for journeying with me. Grateful, as always.
Reblooming orchid- makes me happy to watch the changes each day. 

Friday, November 28, 2014

Back around the corner

Right as I've found my energy and had a good three days in a row... here comes chemo... Le sigh.
Enjoyed getting to appointments, running errands, having special dinners, and even seeing a musical performance... I am happy with the outcome of the week... plus I enjoyed a few audiobooks and am in the middle of a fascinating one presently.
It is so hard to tell when I should keep my face mask on. I actually wore the wig for over 6 hours, that's the longest time for me yet. It is quite warm wearing a wig for so long. Glad I am able to do it though since soon enough I'll have to wear it for work.
Tomorrow- two dose day... shall see. Will see if I'm feeling strong afterwards enough to go see a movie... never know reactions.
PET scan is next Wednesday. Need to clarify how long it will take to get the results... Last time I had it in August it was a complete blur, just know it will take more than a few days. Last time I received a lovely bound booklet with an accompanying CD. Shall see how it goes.
Had to sort out all my vitamins, supplements, and medicine... happy to have it organized but it took over 30 minutes to sort it all out. I'm taking so many more pills nowadays.
I'm getting to the point where I'm anticipating the holiday that we preplanned/paid for back before diagnosis... I'm really staying positive about getting permission to go away for a little while... Bringing along the calendar tomorrow to see how to get extra chemo treatments in as needed.
I tried out a Yuen Method specialist on Thursday. It was an interesting process that I'm still thinking about. I received homework at the end- to watch for the next time I'm upset/angry and step back, take two long breaths and look at the situation as an observer, see how I react then. Hmm. Interesting. Know I've done that before but shall try it again.
Thanks for journeying with me, day by day... grateful for these "up" days and gearing up for whatever comes next...

Tuesday, November 25, 2014

Ears a listening....

Going thru the days with a little purpose, focus... taking things carefully.
Not living in fear but awareness over the fact that I've fainted a few times and I do not want that to occur again nor do I want to be alone if it occurs.
Side effects are slightly less this week. I'm feeling a little stronger. I think... but I'm not pushing myself. My stomach totally is not thrilled with chemotherapy, it won't calm down... but I'm still consistent with medicine/natural treatment. Not so thrilled with rice water but I'm drinking it. Nose isn't happy with the medicine, dealing with many bloody noses but not terrible, will look forward to this lessening eventually.

A wonderful friend suggested I listen to a podcast and then I read about it in a magazine and then another friend told me I'd enjoy it...- that's hard because I love my audiobooks and was in the middle of a really good book. But today I was lost in the podcast- Serial - - now complete and waiting til December for the next airing, fascinating... what research and detail involved.

I'm still trying Yoga Nidra which is peaceful. The friend who has been so sweet coming every week to help me with this practice suggested I listen to a new group, so I am- Edo and Jo... Lovely voices together. A little bit like the chanting and mantras I've been getting accustomed to in the chanting and yoga class.

My hair is growing out- what there is of the hair... shall see if/when more hair begins growing. Kiddo is amused by the whisps that are growing out. I'm watching and noticing more grey than brown but what's new about that? My body has been in crisis for a while, of course the hair will be grey...

Treatment this Saturday will be 2 doses... and then I'll have a PET scan... then one more official treatment the following Saturday. Shall see what happens after that...

Friday, November 21, 2014

Number 10 Chemo, getting there

Number 10, can't believe it has been so long... or so short in terms of life journeys...
Chemo #10 is a 1 dose deal. Two more after that and then possibly more??! Shall see.

I watched a TED talk that was extremely interesting about whether what we eat can starve cancer cells. I certainly have changed my diet completely and know that it has made me feel better (mostly, sometimes I really miss certain foods) and I know it helps me overall...

I found this lecture fascinating. It mentions one of the chemo drugs I'm getting and I find that preventative is much better than reactive. I also know that cancer is NOT my fault. It is happening to me but I didn't welcome it simply by eating the wrong foods or moving to Hong Kong. It has occurred. It sucks. But if there is a way for my friends to adopt a few new foods into their diet to keep cancer from growing, heck, go for it, right?!

So, I'm doing a little better. Thank goodness. Got to appointments, admittedly shakey and weak but I got there. I also have little goals to look forward to, or are they major ones? Work, travel, family time... shall see. I am anticipating and getting over the fear of the PET scan. Not so thrilled that sugar and radiation is going to be pushed into my body again... not thrilled that I have to go hide in a room for an hour to stay away from others so that I don't poison them with the radiation going thru my body... not thrilled that my future rides on the test results... but I'm having faith that if a tumor lights up the scanner, it is due to it dying off from the chemotherapy and what is lighting up is scar tissue. That I'm healing. That this poisonous chemotherapy is doing what it needs to in my body. Having faith.

William Li- Can we eat to starve cancer?

I especially liked this chart. I take a lot of these cancer fighters into my body on a daily basis, I really really hope you dear people do as well:

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Reflecting patiently, calmly

I've been thinking recently about my energy, or lack thereof.
It is ridiculously frustrating to be so tired that when I go brush my teeth I have to sit down on the floor so that I'm not shaking... (On my worst days...)
I'm a high energy type of person. I love to dance, Zumba, work hard, play hard, and enjoy life...
I chatted with my husband the other day about this. Told him how tired I was of how me being weak is the new norm. He reminded me that it is temporary. Is it? I've been told many times that I'm not ever going to be my normal self again after this third cancer diagnosis. I look back at my past life. Think about the gym we joined half a year ago that I haven't been to since August. Think about what I'm missing at work as kids grow up and get library time without me...
It is quite frustrating. I think back to years ago when a normal day included teaching, masters class, and salsa dancing... so different now.
But then I think about how I've changed already.
I'm more open to new treatments beyond acupuncture.
I certainly have learned to ride the waves of energy/lack, etc... read signs for medication needs, dealt with not fun side effects, etc. I know how lucky I am because I'm not curled up in the corner of my bathroom wimpering as I've read others have experienced at times with chemo side effects.
I'm exploring pulling, essential oils, dietary changes, energy healing, Qigong, chanting and more.
I was told by my friend yesterday who is an energy healer that she's impressed with how open I am to energy. How calm I was during the treatment. Asked me if I've always been a calm person... I've always had a good wall up that calms me during stressful situations. Hmm. I have always been able to distance myself when there are tough things confided and help others simply by listening, is this that calm?
Did I learn to be calm somewhere?
I certainly can be calm for hours while reading. Or working on my computer. Hmm.
Did I learn to be calm during radiation treatments? Laying still even with nose itches, side pain, awkward positions because I didn't want the radiation going to the wrong place... was it a form of meditation?
I'm hit or miss on the sleeping scheme, that's how I know I'm still my normal self in a way... but I'm grateful for how I've changed in other ways. I'm certainly braver and more patient when it comes to needles and such... I'm also learning to speak up for myself and ask when I need something. Reaching out to others is less of a challenge than it was in the past.
Dealing with the days.
Happy because my kiddo is home from 2-night camp adventure with classmates which he LOVED and enjoyed learning about kayaking and dragon boating and more... lucky kiddo. My sweet dog will be picked up soon from her surgery and I can't wait to have her back as well.
Thanks for journeying with me- even on my rambling days...

Friday, November 14, 2014

Slow and steady week

Well. I've had a lovely but really slow week. I enjoyed various quieter activities through the week. Also, it was a harder week because I had to pace myself. That's not fun. I think my blood count might be down... or something... maybe a bug of some kind. My stomach isn't being kind, I'm not sleeping quite well, I feel weaker and am shaken after things that last week were simple, and I'm learning to just take it easy... speak up for myself... appreciating the little gifts of life.

Finding myself quite productive on my blog and avoiding my picture book manuscript writing. Amazing how quickly I can be productive when I'm avoiding things. I also have read a load of books this week and LOVED them. Grateful for my version of comfort food- eating books voraciously.

Fainting on Monday honestly threw me. I was chatting with my yoga instructor today about it. He pointed out that fear of fainting again probably presides over my mind and will likely slow me down if I don't relax and redirect my thoughts. Shall try. But at the same time also trying to read my body and know what my limits are... it's a whole new world learning to go slow.

Chemo tomorrow- 3rd cycle of 4 weeks, first week= 3 drugs, sigh. Not looking forward to it but do have good company, grateful.

Tried out one of the Yoga Nidra videos. Glad to learn another peaceful practice outlet, feel like I'm exploring so many things...
Got (I think) a little good news from my insurance company... I think... shall see... will get things sorted out eventually... I think. Having a little hope.
Also feeling blessed by friends and family, thank you to all... still so grateful that Sheli and Rachel visited...

Mostly, honestly, I'm just worried about my sweet dog right now. She's 14 and is my baby still. My constant companion, especially for each round of my fighting cancer... she's comforted me through recovery from three surgeries and when I look, she's watching me... or she's asleep. She has many lumps and bumps on her body... my husband and I agreed it was part of her aging. She doesn't get around as much as she used to but she's still eating and drinking fine, still hangs out with her people in whatever room we are in (although she is Daddy's girl, so mostly wherever my husband is if he's home) and seems like a pretty contented dog. I noticed last week that one big black bump was getting a little larger on her back right leg. She started licking it as well. :( Poor girl gets a little nutty once she starts licking something. Two nights ago she started chewing it. My husband brought her to the vet who said it needed surgery... but at the vet clinic their machine that puts animals to sleep is broken so we'd have to wait for TWO WEEKS before getting the surgery. We've asked for a referral to a different clinic and are looking into it because now she's wearing the cone of shame since she pulled the bandage off and chewed on herself again this morning... (it is not pretty and I'm the one who does the medication, cleaning, wrapping... which is fine but YUCK.) Plus my husband and I both lost sleep last night worrying about her chewing- thank goodness she has that collar on for this night... so I'm trying not to worry. Minor surgery. But she's not that happy presently which makes me not so thrilled either. Sigh.

Off to bed now... sleep hopefully will come and then in the morning, hooked up again to the drip drip drip of drugs.

Monday, November 10, 2014

Mental Rest and Ups and Downs

Today I learned about Yoga Nidra and appreciated a friend coming by to lead me through a session. Fascinating, relaxing, peaceful. Recommended. I'll be trying it out by youtube videos as well as looking forward to working with her on it as well. Also loved catching up with my best friend thru Skype... miss her presence here but reassuring that we can always catch up.

Dealing with insurance frustrations... don't you love it when you hear those words "Um, I'll have to call you back..." and then you don't receive that call? Meh. Not worth my energy, have things ready when I do actually receive a phone call back... Same with emails as well... out of my control, letting go as best I can.

Appreciated reading this article...
Mostly reassuring since I haven't dealt with these thoughts very often.

This afternoon it happened AGAIN. ECH. I was laying down resting and got up to go to the door to chat and pass a book to a friend. My husband was there too. I got a loud buzzing in my head and fainted. My husband caught me... such a confusing thing. I think I got up too quick. I also think that the anti-nausea medicine is the cause for this but not certain... went back to bed and rested. Doing fine now but really glad I was taking it easy... especially glad I wasn't up and taking a walk. I get that for this time I got up too quick... the last two times I was walking around for a while and then standing still for a while and then fainted. Hmm.

So, getting along, my worst day predicted after chemo, know things are cumulative, but not worst situation, grateful for that at least. On the countdown of treatments. Forgot to mention, I gained weight again this past week (woot) - I still find it funny that I'm celebrating weight gain but so be it. Part of life at this time.

Here's two Yoga Nidra YouTube videos I'm planning to make time for in the mornings. - Yoga Nidra for beginners - Yoga Nidra for intermediate

Saturday, November 8, 2014

Packing for Chemo and saving eyebrows

I sat and read thru this post:
I follow What Next on Facebook and appreciate what they have to share. Interesting that they came up with 22 things to bring to chemo... I appreciated what was shared, realistic and honest.

So... what do I pack in my bag for my chemo appointments? Hmm.

1. I pack fresh squeezed juice to drink part way through the morning. Plus my glass water bottle.
2. Some snack foods, almonds and such, banana, and other things that might be good. The clinic provides hot water, so sometimes I bring my own tea bag and cup. Sometimes I bring along my tea that I drink every day which is tumeric, ginger, mint, and green tea combined...
3. My iPhone cord charger and iPhone are loaded with at least two audiobooks, mini-iPad loaded with a new Entertainment Weekly and Oprah magazine, and headphones.
4. A friend- I've had one appointment without a friend, it was a good day to not have a companion because all 8 seats in the clinic were filled with chemo patients and it wasn't fun. I put my audiobook on that day and rested. All other days I've been lucky to have a wonderful supportive friend with me. They are warned that sometimes I snooze but we've enjoyed quality chats and quiet times alike.
5. Magazines, books, and journal. I like writing notes when I'm meeting with my oncologist, I certainly cannot write during chemo treatment (chemo enters through my left hand due to tumors almost all being on the right side, I'm left-handed!) but if I take notes in my journal, it helps me remember what he said later if I'm alone.
6. My chemo clinic provides fleece blankets, pillows, electric blankets, and lazy boy chairs so I don't have to bring the first three along but I certainly wear long pants and a sweatshirt of some kind because I get the chills while I'm sitting there, especially with the initial drugs.
7. I have a special notebook filled with all my cancer (for this round) records which I don't usually bring to the clinic but if I have any concerns or questions, I certainly bring it along. #8 I certainly brought paperwork along as I need to once again clarify and question shortfall costs with insurance, no fun to call the insurance folk but I'm following thru.
8. I try to pick a phrase to repeat to myself when I'm not so thrilled with the drugs dripping into me... "This chemo is going where it needs to and is helping me heal." "I am here." "I can get through this..." I've shared about phrases before. Some people post positive affirmations around their home, I haven't done that but I do have some fixed in my mind. I also have meditation words if I need them and deep breathing practice to naturally use if needed from Qigong and yoga.

That's it for now of what I bring...

I also have a few random traditions- wearing earrings from my sister to keep me strong, a bracelet from a friend that makes me happy, a lovely healing necklace from a former student, and other things that make me smile when I have them on...

I hit 15,000 steps on my FitBit the other day. Then 10,000 the next day, guess which days those were? I love having energy. Yes, I'm resting and taking things easy too, sleeping in, napping, and such but it certainly feels lovely to actually have enough energy to get around a little vs. being stuck in the apartment... I do so love my snuggle time with my dog though! Some days of the week suck but I have little things to pick me up and look forward to almost every day of the week. It helped to schedule Qigong, Yoga, and Chanting- they help guide me through the week but also I'm following through on meeting up with wonderful people if they ask/offer (for the most part)... it is hard to always say "yes" and harder for me to take the initiative to make the plans for some reason even though I always was the organizer in the past. I know I have many people who are there and I haven't asked yet... they're wonderful too...

Presently, my heart hurts. Having to say goodbye to my best friend Sheli was difficult... having to say goodbye to my sister is devastating... two goodbyes in a row to my lifelines who were amazing pick-me-ups sharing laughs, special moments, and getting me thru hard days is just sad. I know there are down days. I'm surrounding myself with good friends and I know I'm not alone here but man goodbyes suck. My yoga instructor Friday asked me why I had such a busy mind during the yoga session. Didn't realize he could notice that. I certainly knew what was on my mind, thinking about chemo for the next day, thinking about goodbyes, wondering why I haven't heard from some people I expected were better communicators, and more... I appreciated that my instructor spoke up and I worked to focus and quiet my mind... not an easy thing to do sometimes.

Enjoyed this video - I've Got No Hair- amusing...

A while ago I shared "save your eyebrows" from "But Doctor I hate Pink" and now when Rachel visited, we worked on saving my eyebrows. My hair is growing in on my head a tiny bit... I can see the change... bald in some areas, wisps in others... whatever needs to happen...

Here's the link for the blog: and video (below) from a blogger I appreciate - Anne from But Doctor I Hate Pink- she shared how to save eyebrows, I copied her gratefully. Never know, might keep my brows and eyelashes, my oncologist thinks I will... I'm 2/3 of the way through chemo now... no fun but I'm getting my bottom to the chair each week and have decided that is success. My oncologist and I talked about when to get the PET scan (first week of December) and side effects. I told him I was concerned whether the chemo was doing what it needed to since I'm reacting without too many side effects in comparison to others, he said I'm doing remarkably well and that you don't need to have side effects in order to have success with chemotherapy. I like my oncologist, he tells it like it is. There's so many unknowns and frustrations I'm swimming in so I'm always grateful for a straight shooter...

Thanks for keeping up with me... day by day, I'm grateful...

Wednesday, November 5, 2014

Special moments

I'm officially blaming things on chemo brain now... my brain is click click clicking but it is often clunk clunk clunking... I'm mixing up days, appointments, and not remembering names of stores, etc.
Thank goodness my fingers can type quickly on my laptop to look up names and back my brain up... and when I make mistakes with appointments, people are so forgiving and flexible.
I mixed up days for the appointment to get my wig trimmed by the generous, wonderful people at Hippfish and they quickly rescheduled me for the next day. In the past I'd be mortified, especially the way I realized that I had an appointment 10 minutes before I was supposed to be there but I was still in my pajamas, whoops... but instead, I forgave myself, took a deep breath and called up Hippfish and admitted I got all mixed up. Phew. They're so kind. Plus ridiculously talented! The experts took a wig that I didn't think was really working for me and trimmed it up at the front and back making it softer on my face so that I actually like the front of the wig and then trimmed the back so that it doesn't look straggly... I now have a special place for my wig to chill out when I'm not wearing it so that it doesn't get squished, etc... Knew I loved going to Hippfish before for regular hair needs but wig needs was a different story, so happy I connected with them last Friday at the CancerLink "Look Good Feel Good" workshop... saying "Yes, thank you" is a good thing.

Love Holly Brown - yummy drinks and gelato -
great to take a break there to regain energy.

So over the past week my sister and I have relaxed, got pedicures on my crappy day, wandered around many places and did some touristy activity. I've shown Rachel many areas of Central, Admiralty, Wan Chai, Causeway Bay, Stanley Market, Peak... yet it feels like we've barely scratched the surface of Hong Kong. We're pacing ourselves so that I don't faint or crash... taking breaks and sitting down in some areas...  I'm so grateful she's here, I wouldn't get out barely at all if I didn't have such a positive, supportive person with me...  Feeling quite blessed to have the back to back visits first with my best friend Sheli and second with my wonderful sister Rachel...

A few more days with Rachel and then she's returning to Oregon. I'm loving this time we have together... Don't get me wrong, I'm dealing with many chemo side effects (besides some brain glitches) that are just no fun... the scalp is yelling at me, the nose is still bleeding- not excessively or anything, energy isn't strong, especially a few days after the treatment, the stomach is totally annoyed with me- drinking brown rice water to calm it down, and my cuts aren't healing... but honestly I'm feeling like I'm having many "normal" moments which is just a beautiful thing. *Can't blame spilling water and other liquids FOUR times on my iPhone in one day on chemo, right? My husband and sister both told me I'm just a klutz and laughed along with me... AND I just spilled again, sigh... takes talent. Really enjoying introducing Rachel to my wonderful friends here in Hong Kong... so grateful for my families at home in Oregon and here in Hong Kong. Feeling surrounded by love and support.

I was surprised when we got home from our adventures today to find a box waiting for me from a librarian friend in Oregon. Opened it and found a really cool book with vintage stories, blank pages, and a cool cover but what was special about it was the wonderful messages from my library friends from Oregon Association of School Libraries- they passed it around at a conference and also a board meeting- I miss those friends so much, loved my time throughout the year with them... the book is filled with journaled notes of love and encouragement and appreciation from friends in Oregon. Just a beautiful surprise, so grateful.
Thanks to my OASL family for the special notes!

Thanks for journeying with me... so grateful...

Saturday, November 1, 2014

Companionship and collapsed vein

Chemo Week 7. This isn't something I'm getting used to. Sure there is the routine that I'm familiar with but feeling the liquid push into me sucks, every week. Most weeks I shiver and feel quite cold as the drip begins. Two drugs this time. Meh. I wouldn't wish this on anyone.
I talked with the nurse about my veins today, no fun to do so but found out that one vein isn't viable anymore for chemo drip, it has collapsed. I knew it would be coming but I find it sad at the same time. Two weeks ago I could tell my veins were not happy and I had quite a bruise/quite a bit of pain.
So, this past week included saying goodbye after almost two weeks to my best friend Sheli who was such a godsend and wonderful companion... so grateful for the time we had together. (Thank you Sheli, love you BF, so lucky to have such a beautiful friend for over 28 years....)

Goodbye at the airport the good way, with fun photos and hugs...

Now we welcomed my sister Rachel for a 9 day visit. It is fabulous to have time together with her. She arrived just in time for Halloween and brought along some fun wigs. I loved walking around with a wig, quite amusing and fun. I know we look a little similar... we love to surprise people who know only one or the other of us and come into a place together. Was amusing at the oncologists office today when the nurses chuckled over our similarities... So we are exploring Hong Kong slowly together. I won't push it. In fact, after chemo today, we went to lunch at a great place SimplyLife, enjoyed a yummy salad there. We also wandered through the gardens but when we got to stairs for special areas I realized it was enough... so we headed home. See? I stopped. That's what Sheli taught me to do this past week. Can enjoy what we do without pushing too much.
Already brought Rachel to a bookstore, love our wigs... fun time...

My sister and I had a conversation today with my oncologist about December. He wants to do the PET scan to see how successful this chemo has been the second week in December and then wants to immediately continue with a fourth round, ARGH ARGH. This means a few more chemo sessions. But then he said he thought that I might be able to go on the family holiday trip that we'd planned. Not promising anything since much hinges on results from the PET scan... so far blood tests that do have cancer markers after the lung/lymph node surgery the cancer markers were really high but they've progressively lowered over the past month... so it's another wait and see situation. ARGH to more chemo. I knew it was probably coming, just not thrilled. Maintained weight this week, considering that a success...
Attended a Look Good, Feel Good workshop with my sister at CancerLink and appreciated the fashion, wig chat, and makeup demonstration. I really like the Hippfish Salon, talented people there- went before diagnosis, and know how generous it is that they volunteeer and donate their time to present to a group of interested people... so personable, friendly, knowledgeable, and friendly as well. I personally enjoyed many tips, especially the reminder that as a cancer patient (or just regular person) we should try to find non-scent/sensitive skin laundry detergent and quit using fabric softener... Wear bright colors vs black and white so that you compliment and accentuate yourself... Moisturize... Eyebrow tutorial was quite interesting, shall see if I need to do it, so far I haven't lost mine! But Rachel brought a transparency sheet with her so that I can trace my eyebrows so that I have a guide to draw them in if needed. Wigs... wigs... wigs... I've mentioned that I'm more comfortable popping fabric on my head vs. a wig. Wigs are expensive. I did buy a curly wig that is nice enough but I learned what makes me uncomfortable about the front of the wig. So I've made an appointment at Hippfish to get my wig trimmed a little bit by an expert and am curious to see how that works out. I want to just feel a little confident and comfortable.
Healing the past...
A friend shared this article, it really relates to what I've heard over the past few months:
Thanks for traveling through this journey, day by day... Have been distracted, in a good way, by life this past week so will say that when there's just one chemo drug pushed into me, I gain energy through the week and am honestly a little frustrated to have Saturday's treatment looming over me for that limit coming up... Part of life. Appreciating every day I wake up and can have a little fun.
Really missing work but enjoying books, books, and magazines.

Here's some of the recommended stuff from the Look Good Feel Good workshop: