Showing posts with label food. Show all posts
Showing posts with label food. Show all posts

Friday, March 27, 2015

Holiday and it feels so good

Made book earrings. Admire people who make jewelry so much!

Bali
Whoo hoo for a little time away.
Appreciate holidays.
Have to type posts on my iphone since my ipad won't let me on Blogger. Sigh. 
Here's something I've had on my mind... I really like not being the cancer patient with strangers. It's a weird relief. I never really enjoyed talking about my arthritis thru the years unless it randomly came up (usually because of my food choices) or would help someone. Now cancer really can be hidden as well. Hmm.  

Sure. My wonderful friend is here with us for this trip. She's keeping a close eye on me and having fun at the same time. (Megan has been around and supported me thru all three diagnoses plus chemo and weekly visits for qi gong, etc. Such a good friend.) 
Time with my husband and kiddo is treasured. Even the times when the kiddo is a little annoying and over enthusiastic, feeling lucky. 
I like not being mostly bald this trip. Not as much conversation about cancer.  I still get fatigued at times and need a rest but overall I'm not being held back and I'm having fun. 

I'm posting pictures on Facebook and instagram and will have blog posts with adventures included. 
For now just a few glimpses. 
Had fun working on batik. 

Like this picture my friend Megan suggested and took. 


Friend shared this article, really useful.
http://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-18004/the-ultimate-guide-to-cruciferous-vegetables.html


Monday, February 23, 2015

And then she said...

Decided to type a little bit.
I'm not shy. I used to be, not so much so now. I find teaching/learning opportunities all over the place, don't you?

I had the lovely opportunity to teach about kindness and manners today.
"Please don't point and me and yell 'Woah!', instead, could you please say 'Mrs. Alvarez, you surprised me with this hair change.'"
"Excuse me, when I say 'Good morning' and you don't say anything and just giggle to your friend as you go by, I think you're laughing at me. Instead, could you say, 'Mrs. Alvarez, I'm noticing your hair is different' or 'Good morning' please?"

"Mrs. Alvarez, what did you DO to your HAIR?!"
"1. Yes, my hair is different. 2. It is colored different. 3. It is rude to interrupt, can you see I'm running a battle here?"
- battle of the books competitions began today, always tough to see teams losing but love seeing everyone stocking up and reading more books!!

Dialogue:
"Mrs. Alvarez."
"Yes."
"Is this your hair?"
"Yes"
"Did you color it?"
"Yes"
"Were you wearing a wig before this?"
"Yes"
(This was my favorite dialogue, straightforward, honest, and moved on with things quickly.)

One sweetie walked up to me, "You changed your hair, it looks like my grandma's hair now!" I thought to myself, you've got a cool grandma then... but also gave her a look like, seriously?!

Only one student asked, "Seriously, what is going on with your hair, can you explain to me, please?" - I handed her the book Nowhere Hair - love that picture book, so thoughtfully written- during the lunch since I was running a battle and couldn't chat, told her it was a similar situation to mine... She's a caring sweetie. Shall chat with her more soon.

Some kids gave me huge smiles.
Some gave me wide-eyed shocked looks but then smiled and said "Hi"...
Other kids came up and said they loved my new style and color.
My colleagues were beautifully supportive and kind and I appreciate them to bits.

Yeah.
Hair.
Think it will take at least this week to muddle thru the confused looks and conversation. I do have 700 students to see eventually... I only saw around 220 today, maybe a few more... Now WHAT will happen if my hair all falls out with the last 2 rounds of chemo? I do have permission to wear hats... le sigh. Don't miss you wig, not a bit.

Why am I letting the PET scan loom over me like a storm cloud? I hate "what if?" things. I just want to have a few weeks off... got thru #24. 6 left. That's 1 Monday, 2 Tuesdays, 1 Wednesday, 1 Thursday, 1 Friday. One day at a time. I'm exhausted today. Already curled up in bed. Enjoyed work. Ok staff meeting. Appreciated a lovely friend walking me to the hospital and chatting with me for almost an hour when the clinic ran late, what is with them and Mondays? And glad when the minibus arrived just minutes after I went to wait for it... Not much appetite today. Forced myself to eat lunch. Ate a small portion for dinner. Hoping for better tomorrow... Shall see. Funny enough my appetite is weird and I just want bad food presently like macaroni and cheese-- from a box thank you--- and Ikea meatballs- greasier the better, thanks... yep. I know what it would do to my body. Nope I'm holding back, mostly. Yep, I will eat mostly unhealthy crap if that's what it takes to get food in my body. Shall see!

Thanks for journeying with me... was brave today, was slightly scared, and did I mention I adore my colleagues for their supportive conversations and then other topic discussions as well? Grateful...

Sunday, February 22, 2015

Going to work...

Days are slow going.
Enjoyed many off although I often felt slightly guilty through the week that I wasn't more fun, wasn't organizing play dates, and was leaving the brunt of everything- cooking, shopping, dog walking, kiddo entertaining... to my husband. He's wonderful. Just wish it was a better balance but appreciate what he's done picking up the pieces. He's told me in his own way to keep up what I'm doing to stay positive and work on kicking cancer out of my body. Don't think all of my practices with essential oils, Chinese herbal medicine that grosses me out each time I drink it, qi gong practices, yoga and such are completely understood but boy do I feel complete support of everything I'm doing in this journey to keep strong and get rid of cancer.

Going to work without a wig.
Been looming.
Started making up a chant about it.
Silly I know. But there's my brain.

Inspired by - We're going on a bear hunt...

I'm going to work wigless, it's gonna be a big one, I'm not scared.
Can't avoid it, can't ignore it, just gonna push through it,
one day at a time....
-Stop- that's where I'd like to stop for now.

Grateful I got through a few commitments I was concerned about over the past week. Felt good to keep promises. Didn't accomplish everything I'd hoped to over the past week, especially with some professional reading I wanted to get through... Shall see what I get through over the next few weeks. It took me a while to read a book for one commitment and after I finished that I started this terrible book that I promised one of my students I'd read ages ago... I really, really don't like it. I can see why kids do though... I think. So, to clear the bad taste out of my mouth from the horrible book I had to read a few book treasures for future book reviews. Loved them, just like I knew I would. Shall be finishing that terrible book tonight. It actually has three stories in one book. Only going to torture myself with one of them. Will be happy to return it to the library and move on to other books instead... (So sorry to my Enid Blyton friends, I really tried, really. I just don't like her style and I feel quite disconnected the whole time I reading the book... sigh.)


Read this article about the food industry and found it thoroughly disturbing and simultaneously enlightening...
http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2015/feb/21/a-feast-of-engineering-whats-really-in-your-food

As always, thanks for journeying with me. Probably will be quiet this week as I tackle many days of activities and commitments and treatment...  one day at a time...

Friday, November 21, 2014

Number 10 Chemo, getting there

Number 10, can't believe it has been so long... or so short in terms of life journeys...
Chemo #10 is a 1 dose deal. Two more after that and then possibly more??! Shall see.

I watched a TED talk that was extremely interesting about whether what we eat can starve cancer cells. I certainly have changed my diet completely and know that it has made me feel better (mostly, sometimes I really miss certain foods) and I know it helps me overall...

I found this lecture fascinating. It mentions one of the chemo drugs I'm getting and I find that preventative is much better than reactive. I also know that cancer is NOT my fault. It is happening to me but I didn't welcome it simply by eating the wrong foods or moving to Hong Kong. It has occurred. It sucks. But if there is a way for my friends to adopt a few new foods into their diet to keep cancer from growing, heck, go for it, right?!

So, I'm doing a little better. Thank goodness. Got to appointments, admittedly shakey and weak but I got there. I also have little goals to look forward to, or are they major ones? Work, travel, family time... shall see. I am anticipating and getting over the fear of the PET scan. Not so thrilled that sugar and radiation is going to be pushed into my body again... not thrilled that I have to go hide in a room for an hour to stay away from others so that I don't poison them with the radiation going thru my body... not thrilled that my future rides on the test results... but I'm having faith that if a tumor lights up the scanner, it is due to it dying off from the chemotherapy and what is lighting up is scar tissue. That I'm healing. That this poisonous chemotherapy is doing what it needs to in my body. Having faith.

William Li- Can we eat to starve cancer? https://www.ted.com/talks/william_li#t-1186611

I especially liked this chart. I take a lot of these cancer fighters into my body on a daily basis, I really really hope you dear people do as well:
http://tedconfblog.files.wordpress.com/2010/02/antiangiogenic.jpg?w=525&h=394

Wednesday, October 1, 2014

Over the slump? Protests, scarf tying, food, and more.

Allowed myself down time. Felt good.
Simply rested and relaxed, read and watched shows...
It's been a bit tumultuous here in Hong Kong watching the newsfeeds, kiddo home (bonus), schools closed to students- many colleagues working from home because it isn't easy to get to work with road blocks, trams closed, MTR station closures, etc. My husband has gone into work each day but this week was odd anyways since there's Wednesday and Thursday public holidays and Friday staff training day. So, my son had no school Mon/Tues and won't have school again til next Monday... he isn't complaining. We're lucky to have some of his friends around for distraction and overnight fun.

If you don't know what is going on here, there are a few articles I found helpful about these pro-democracy protests (peaceful and organized, I'm not going out in them- too many germs but am in full support of Hong Kong citizens speaking up for their right to a democratic election instead of what has been decided in Beijing:
http://blogs.wsj.com/chinarealtime/2014/09/28/hong-kong-pro-democracy-movement-gets-global-support/

There are many videos and straightforward reporting pieces. Honestly, the tear gas really scared me that first night of protests, made me worry about escalations with rubber bullets, made me think about Tiananmen Square, etc. but it has been peaceful civil disobedience since... Some friends are collecting water, ice packs, umbrellas, and more for the students and adults protesting. Other friends joined in the protests last night and today. There is a beautiful, caring, hopeful community here in Hong Kong and I'm grateful to be a part of it, even though I'm sticking inside and protecting myself from germs, etc.

My sister continually has shared touching, inspirational, and thoughtful posts with me on a daily basis.... and also some yummy recipes! Here's one with multiple recipes that gave me hope for new yummy food solutions:
http://bembu.com/homemade-protein-bars

I also appreciated that she sent me two how-to tie a headscarf videos. Both are pretty reasonable and doable... Thank you so much...
and

So... besides protests, family/kiddo time... I've been really quiet the past two days. Sunday was a wonderful day where I was just packed with energy. Monday and Tuesday were both "take the anti-nausea medicine NOW" days... every 4 hours. In the evening on Monday I didn't think I "needed" it and then my body freaked out two hours after I was supposed to take it with shakiness/almost fainting- in my bathroom, not in the MTR thank goodness... so I'm still figuring this all out. I do so hate any kind of medication but as a friend said to me, the fear of throwing up will get you to take that medicine!
Wednesday has brought this public holiday, a wonderful lunch out with friends, no anti-nausea medicine, wonderful phone call with my sister, and family time. Grateful for every minute I have... happy to be doing ok. Not pushing myself.
Watching shows here and there and laughing my way thru things. Decided that going to the Laughter Yoga session today (would have been right when I'm writing this) was a poor decision since it would have me on the MTR for 45 minutes plus taking a mini-bus somewhere over on the Kowloon side of Hong Kong where I'm happy to venture sometimes but I also have a talent for misplacing myself.... so I am hoping that backing out 24 hours in advance was ok and I'm happy to laugh with a funny show instead. I'm also beginning to read and really enjoy a book by Thich Nhat Hanh called You Are Here: Discovering the Magic of the Present Moment... Nice to dive into an adult book about mindfulness. I'm balancing it with a YA fantasy book which has been fun to begin called Keeper of the Realms- Crow's Revenge by Marcus Alexander.... author visit in the spring.
Food-wise, I've added back chicken, still treating it as an appetizer but I can feel the protein hit much faster at times now. Makes me happy to be giving my body what it needed. I pray I don't lose weight this week but will accept whatever comes with this treatment and know I'm trying my best. Plus I'm not having as many upset stomach issues lately... the chinese herbal medicine from my acupuncturist might be working! (I'm trying to be consistent about drinking it...) Plus I'm drinking a tea made from fresh ginger, tumeric, and peppermint tea leaves... that's feeling healthy and balanced. Drinking that one accompanied by water throughout the day. Really keeping my fluid intake up up up.
Creative wise, I had fun with two things- one- I have an art pad to doodle in now... liking that outlet. Also, I picked up yarn and a crochet hook, will be trying that out on Saturday. My husband is coming with me to chemo treatment which will be helpful. He and I love watching movies and shows together. I have 2 drugs coming this week which means around 4 hours or so... as long as everything is fine.
I also tried out something that a friend/former parent at my old school suggested. Using slippery elm bark powder mixed with coconut oil for a lotion/cure-all for my skin. Her directions were: "Mix about 1/4 cup coconut oil with 2-3 tablespoons of slippery elm bark powder and use it as a lotion."
Done. Used. Appreciating physically and mentally.
Still doing that coconut oil pull and mouth rinse throughout the day... anything to protect my mouth and body...
Not sure what my 30 year old self would think about all these extra things I'm doing but I'm glad to have outlets for expressing myself, options for treating myself, and good doctors helping me through this experience. Here's to a better day. Tomorrow is my birthday, 41, oh boy. Many family and friends have asked me what we're doing... my answer was, depends on energy! But I do know the kiddo is going for an overnight fun time with a favorite friend in the afternoon, so I can have date night with my husband! Hoping to get into Jamie Oliver's new restaurant that opened up really close to our apartment and perhaps go see a movie like Mazerunner or something... Love time with my husband. Feel lucky to have these opportunities.

Saturday, September 27, 2014

Chemo Treatment 2 of 12

Well.
Got thru another day.
No fun to go thru this.
Was grateful for the anti-nausea medicine being pumped in after the benadryl.
Only 1 of 3 meds today.
My life coach suggested I dig deep to find things that will bring me to the clinic every week. My things for this week were: audiobook of Mary Poppins- laughing, time with husband and son afterwards- anticipation, chatting with friends and ride home with friend- support, and expectation that things will hit Monday and Tuesday - hope for an ok weekend. I got there.

My friend told me that this might be an easier week since it was only 1 med but the cumulative effects will slowly make my 'bad' days worse - Monday/Tuesday. So I'll take that anti-nausea medicine quick and early and take it easy as I should.
It was only 4 hours at my oncologist's office vs 7, that was not pleasant at all but ok.
This is the week that hair might start coming out. Oh boy. At least I have many scarves, hats, and such to entertain me once I get it shaved off.
I know it is odd but I'm filling my days. I really miss work. Really miss students. Really miss connections to my colleagues. It isn't fun. I'm enjoying reading when my concentration is there. Enjoying watching shows which I don't have to work too hard at.

I'm turning 41 this Thursday. Oh boy. Turning 40 wasn't great since I had my radical hysterectomy on that day... 41? Chemo treatment effects. Grateful to be here. Grateful to have this chance to celebrate life and be with family and friends but boy, wouldn't mind that future 42 birthday being just a little easier. For me, for my family, and my friends...
A friend who is struggling for a terribly different reason posted on Facebook today something that resonated with me:

"Dear whatever doesn't kill me,
I'm strong enough now.
Thanks!"

Found the ecard of it:

I'm not down emotionally right now, actually feeling pretty positive on the day of treatment. Got to go out with my husband and son, try out a new restaurant, wander thru a few shops, pick up craft supplies at the Hong Kong version of a dollar store, and relax with a few shows with my husband tonight. Almost felt like a typical relaxing Saturday afternoon to be honest. I enjoyed every moment, even when my son and I argued over silly things and I had to apologize to my husband about being a grouch this morning when he didn't read my mind. Yes. I was angry and snappy that he didn't read my mind. I'm not a morning person in the first place. Add heading off to chemotherapy and I'm not a fun person to be around, even when I'm trying my best. Poor guy was just in his own world and not worried about me, which he shouldn't have to be 24x7. But talking it out this evening for a few minutes cleared the air, gotta talk things out!!

I went thru a few 'damn it' moments this past week. One was during pre-chemo treatment today when I found out I lost 2 more pounds. Seriously. I'm really eating a LOT and packing it in. Even ate a mini-carton of Happy Cow Coconut Vanilla ice cream tonight... But I'm still losing weight. Damn cancer. My oncologist isn't happy but told me it is normal to lose weight and to "eat". Seriously. I'm freaking eating. Even added in chicken this week which was weird to have back in my diet- treated it as an appetizer as I planned... and I added in bone soup thanks to a friend's generous sharing... My acupuncturist told me to try to drink a cup of it every day. Will try!
The other 'damn it' moment was dealing with the public hospital system for the first time. Good thing- I know what to expect now. Bad thing- I know what to expect now. Blech. I already dislike waiting, and I do have to wait a lot lately. But waiting in an uncomfortable chair, wearing a face mask, seeing 30 other cancer patients, and waiting for 2 hours and 45 minutes wasn't a thrill. The oncologist I met was knowledgeable and plenty experienced and told me that I'm a pretty special case. Yes, special, that's me, I go above and beyond. He said that he wanted me to continue to do chemotherapy through my private doctor so that we didn't interrupt the protocols already set in motion. (Ok) Then he scheduled a follow up appointment in November - scheduled for 10am but he told me to bring my lunch and expect to see him around 2-3pm, seriously!!- to see how I'm doing and whether I qualify for getting radiation through the public system. Basically, he's worried about radiation so close to where I already had it for my breast cancer treatment- me too! But as my wonderful husband said to the doctor when he said this, "Whatever it takes."

Living with Metastatic Breast Cancer - I know I don't have this but it is one of the closest things I can find to what I'm going thru since I'm such a "special" case... Appreciated this video:



And now... moving on. Day by day my friends. THANK YOU for all the support. Grateful. Grateful. Grateful...

Sunday, September 14, 2014

Blood blood blood

Blood thoughts:
Ages ago, I decided my oncologist was a vampire.
He always wanted my blood, right from the get-go.
He had his own blood testing lab right there in his office.
The cost of blood tests added up and up and up...

Now, with chemotherapy, one of the drugs I'll be on makes you deficient with red blood cells. Oh boy. More blood blood blood tests plus the focus on food, thank goodness I'm used to both.

A good friend reminded me about this and mentioned how she had a hard time continuing chemo because she was low on her red blood cells... so she tried to eat foods that would build them up.

So, what is good for building red blood cells?
Hmm.
I'm not eating meat but that's not necessary. (I really hope.)

On: http://www.nlm.nih.gov/medlineplus/ency/article/000584.htm

They tell me to eat these:
Iron-rich foods include:
Chicken and turkey
Dried lentils, peas, and beans
Fish
Meats (liver is the highest source)
Peanut butter
Soybeans
Whole-grain bread

Other sources include:
Oatmeal
Raisins, prunes, and apricots
Spinach, kale, and other greens

Hmm.
I do eat beans and lentils a LOT. Salmon is part of my meals. Plus I'm allowed to eat Ezekial bread- whole grains! Woot. Raisins and apricots, can do. Spinach, kale and other greens? Absolutely yes.
Meats? No no no. Peanut butter? No. Soybeans? Well... I've been trying to avoid soy because of the estrogen factor but recently added back in edamame and miso soup, so I guess that'll do...

Next site: http://www.livestrong.com/article/349946-foods-to-eat-to-increase-red-blood-cells/Sources of iron include red meat, organ meat such as kidney and livers, beans, lentils, dark green leafy vegetables, such as spinach and kale, dried prunes, dried raisins and egg yolks, according to MedlinePlus.
Sounding similar, phew. BUT NO EGGS. (I miss eggs, just avoiding as well because of the estrogen factor.)

Next site: http://www.md-health.com/How-To-Increase-Red-Blood-Cells.html
Ok, this one has an interesting list:
Eating the right foods can help increase the number of red blood cells in your body. Here are a few of the ways you can eat your way to better blood cell health:
Iron. Food rich in iron can help your body rebuild what it has lost. Lentils and legumes are a great way to get the iron you need and they are healthy for you in many other ways, too.
Copper. This vital mineral can be found in many foods, including shellfish, poultry, liver, whole grains, beans, cherries, chocolate and nuts.
Folic Acid. Long known as a great help for pregnant and nursing mothers, foods that contain folic acid include lentils, dark green leafy vegetables, blackeyed peas and cereals fortified with folic acid.
Vitamin A. This very important vitamin can be found in a multitude of fruits, including grapefruit, mango, watermelon, plums, cantaloupe and apricots.
Vitamin B12. Meat, eggs and fortified cereals are a great way to get plenty of B12 in your diet. Since those on a western diet get plenty of this, a lack of B12 is rare.
Vitamin B6. This vitamin is found in a wide variety of foods, including meats, whole grains and bran, nuts and seeds, fish, vegetables and legumes.

Plus I find their supplement suggestions interesting, don't want to take things that conflict with chemo but...

Sometimes diet isn’t enough to increase red blood cells. In that case, turning to supplements can help your body produce the red blood cells it needs. Here are a few options:
Iron. This is a vital nutrient that your blood cells need to function properly. Women need 18 mg and men need 8 mg of iron per day.
Vitamin B12. Derived from mostly animal foods, B12 can be lacking in vegetarians. Everyone needs 2.4 mcg per day, and a supplement can provide most of that.
Vitamin B6. Women need 1.5 mg of this vitamin each day, while men need a bit more at 1.7 mg. A supplement can provide this, and you can boost the intake with baked potatoes, bananas and fish.
Vitamin E. This vitamin is excellent for good health, including red blood cells. Everyone needs about 15 mg of this per day. However, supplements might provide much more than that, so speak with your doctor about whether that is okay for you.

Similar things though to be honest... looks like I can still survive without meat... besides salmon that is... I refused to take iron supplements in the past though as I noticed it activated my arthritis. Hmm.

Other websites I read from repeated the same things... Hmm.

Other thoughts beyond blood...

One friend and I were talking about how Vitamin D deficiencies could also lead to cancer and how I should have my Vitamin D levels checked before I begin chemo. Hmm. I've requested to have this done on my chemo day- when they take blood from me before...

Another friend told me that she was able to avoid Neuropothy - where you get numb fingers, toes, feet that tingle painfully - side effect of chemo- (yuck) by taking these supplements: Alpha lipoic Acid and L-Glutamine and walking a good amount every day... good to know, right?
Information about that:
http://www.dana-farber.org/Health-Library/Alleviating-Peripheral-Neuropathy-Symptoms.aspx

Interesting video about exercise practice for those going thru chemo/recovering from cancer treatments:
http://www.dana-farber.org/Health-Library/Exercise-linked-to-breast-cancer-survivorship.aspx

Think this website is worth spending time at for a while. Good interviews with survivors, etc!
My wonderful sister-in-law suggested I visit a few websites that were inspiring, one written by a friend of hers. Appreciated obsessively reading thru all the posts here: http://sothenthishappened.blogspot.hk/2013_03_01_archive.html and here: http://abumpandalump.blogspot.hk/

Appreciating advice.
Appreciating online research.
Appreciating experts.
Hoping I'm not going overboard with all of this.
Just want to survive, thrive and feel like I'm dealing with things with information backing me up....
Short hair is coming tomorrow afternoon... glad to have friends around for it.
Starting Qigong on Tuesday night, hoping friends show up and it is worth the energy. (All about energy, so should be a win!)
Looking like a full week coming up... but full of action taking moments, which is good. Very good.