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| What I can look up at during lunch duty at school... Bauhinia tree |
Been thinking about life...
How I keep thinking that I'm a shadow of myself... can tell I'm hitting that fatigued state that I hit during the last two rounds of radiation. I remember being annoyed with myself the past two times but this time I'm working to be patient and loving with myself.
If I have to be a shadow of myself, I need to try to be the best shadow of myself. What do I like most about myself? Where do I direct my energy? Why should I dedicate any time for worry or anger that could be focused on love and support?
Working to think out activities... I'm excited that we've changed our plans and now are able to have tickets to move home to the US in July and also visit Bali. We're going there for Spring Break/Easter holiday. Very happy and curious to see what we get to do. I'm slightly sad to not get home over the coming holiday but since we're moving home, it feels wise to travel cheaply and adventure a little more in Asia.
Have focused this month on sharing my sense of humor with others... making children laugh? a treasure. Making my son laugh? HAPPY day. Hearing my husband laugh? warms my heart... When I actually laugh aloud? Rare. I usually laugh in my head.
Here's something that made me laugh aloud recently:
I was chatting with some of my older students during their lunch break in the library the other day. One reader was holding a book I adore (and actually even mentioned here before) - Because of Anya by Margaret Peterson Haddix- the book is about a girl who has alopecia areata- losing all hair. Talked with the girl and others about how I cut/donated my hair to Locks of Love in the past. One student said to me: "That's quite funny Mrs. Alvarez because some students were saying that you were wearing a wig but instead you've donated your hair for a wig!" I said to him, "I did that a long long time ago... Hmm." Later I chuckled and chuckled about this...
I haven't talked about wearing a wig with any of the kids. But I do have permission to wear a hat at school now. Quite comfortable when I have a hat on... Shall see. I do know that this past Friday I told myself that I no longer would wear the wig to school. Hoping to not place it back on my head, shall see. Enough about wigs and hair.
Little baby eyelashes are starting to grow out now. Once again I had that thought at first, "huh, thought I washed off my makeup last night. Oh, that's little hairs growing out!"
Going to start writing lists again to prepare for the July move. When to provide notices, pack, mail boxes, deal with paperwork, and more...
So grateful for this break from work.... Long naps and sleeping til a normal hour is just beautiful to enjoy. Makes days go by and treatments a little bearable.
Interesting information on mushrooms that can prevent cancer here in this article, a lovely friend sent it my way...
http://www.positivehealth.com/article/cancer/cancer-killing-medicinal-mushrooms
Getting through the days... one at a time.
Thanks for journeying with me...
