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Love my lunch duty time because I can see
such beautiful living things. |
I haven't thought about writing much recently. This week has been a little challenging for me. I'm so grateful I had the previous week off. This past week I had 4 evening activities. Two were "goodbye" dinner events which are really hard for me. I don't enjoy goodbyes. I feel socially awkward in them usually. These two events though included some really interesting conversationalists and also some dear friends sitting close which made them special... and a little harder in a way. I was pretty much plugging my way thru each work day with patience. I love school. I've mentioned this before. I love students... they gift me energy and love...
For now though, I'm just fatigued. I've been dealing with some disturbing sleep patterns that I haven't had before where I fall asleep but can't sleep more than an hour at a time without waking up. And falling back to sleep is harder that I've experienced before. And the dreams I'm having are weird and vivid where I'm working out someone else's worries and concerns. For example: One dream I've been having for multiple days is about a woman who did testing on whales of some sort and realized that the testing was emotionally disturbing them so they were beaching themselves. I dreamed about the aftermath where she was heartbroken and having to defend herself. ... so just weird. So serious.
I'm taking it easy and napping a little bit since I'm in the middle of a beautiful long weekend.
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| Student led conference included science electricity demonstration. |
My kiddo is having a terrific weekend... a little time with me and a chance to go to a movie together (Tomorrowland- pretty heavy handed with message but decent enough flick) and enjoyed a little time together but he's mostly away at wonderful friend's homes at sleepovers. Glad my husband and I organized them. Kiddo told me today he just cannot wait to move home to Oregon but he regrets that all these good friends he has now will be left behind... glad he's so reflective, good kiddo.
My husband is away in the Philippines scuba diving, really happy for him... glad he has this opportunity. Miss him though, been a long while since we've been apart for days.
I've had a little time to watch the Hay House World Summit movies... E-Motion, The Shift, and The Tapping Solution are the ones I watched today. Such interesting creations reflecting on the emotional state... appreciate them. They're free for around one more week. Hooray for free healthy resources. Grateful.
https://www.hayhouseworldsummit.com/lessons/the-tapping-solution/
http://www.thetappingsolution.com/
Trying out tapping actually started to distract me from my frustrating side pain and stomach pain I've been consistently having. I also started having back pain, perhaps because of all the bed rest. I went to get a massage (one more prepaid massage left!) and the therapist said to me "so you're getting fat". I chuckled at this for a while. Told her that I actually am trying to gain weight and that my Dr. is concerned that I'm not gaining weight. She was astounded. Funny how someone who works on bodies would state this or be surprised. I carry my weight in my legs, that's where she was looking. Still funny to me. Told a friend about it and she told me about how when she lived in Ghana it is traditionally the greatest compliment for someone to say that you are fat... that would be quite the thing to get used to!
Went to my oncologist yesterday and he told me I should be feeling better. That he thinks I've reached the turning point of this last round of chemo... shall see. Love that he also said "I know it is hard for you" and did the heavy hand pat on my back on my way out of his office, he's a good guy, shall miss his support. I can tell that I'm better than a week ago but the pain in my side is really distracting me, can't just ignore it sometimes... and no way to massage the area.
Was interesting when someone asked me the other day if I ever slow down. I didn't realize I was giving that impression of busyness anymore. I'm still blogging and working but really, I'm so much slower and more purposeful with where I put forth my energy... not sure why it came up. Maybe the person was trying to measure herself to me? Doesn't really matter. I told her that this whole diagnosis experience has made me slower and careful about pacing myself...
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My dog can still hear loud thunder and lightning.
There have been many storms recently. Poor girl. |
I'm working on the transition moving home. My important things were to connect with an oncologist in the US and get insurance for the few months I'm not covered by either job. I figured out insurance now and also contacted the oncologist I feel confident going to see... I have a load to "to do" things to do here before we move like getting a background check done with the Hong Kong police to show I'm clear when I'm back in the US... also I have to deal with various financial things- taxes, retirement paperwork, and more. Trying to just pace myself and get things sorted carefully. Things will work out eventually...
A friend shared this link on Facebook, really interesting to see which organizations own organic brands... kind of mind boggling.
http://www.washingtonpost.com/graphics/business/organic-brands/
Well, thanks for journeying with me. I'm taking things day by day as always... reaching deep in my toolbox for what will help me. Happy I am trying out tapping again. Happy days to all...
