#16 check!!! Mentally preparing for radiation.

So ready to get going. Don't I look thrilled?
My poor skin... and eyebrows/eyelashes...
anticipating them growing back sooner than
later and skin returning to 41 year old self vs. 13 year old self.

I am so very happy and relieved to have #16 chemo session, round 4 session four DONE DONE DONE. Seriously. Next week I have the week off of treatment til Friday when I go into the hospital to get a new radiation "cast" and get a CAT scan done. Not fun. Third time, same place but at least they call me Debbie vs Deborah. Seriously, that really goes far with me. I really like the techs there. They are kind, patient, and try to communicate with me. I will have to see them for 6 weeks this time. Blech. I'll probably start the following Monday on the 19th, shall see. Depends on many factors. Hoping I can have an afternoon slot.
I have such high hopes about recovering from chemo for a little while... healthier nails and skin over a month's time, hair hopefully starts growing out more, etc... Let's not think about side effects from radiation for now, ok? I still have memories of burned skin and internal pain that aren't helpful for the present moment but I certainly have stuff to put on it and pain medication from past experience.
Sure, I have 2 more rounds of chemo to do in 7 weeks but they aren't every week, only twice... with 3 weeks in between. I can bear up and handle it...
I talked with my doctor today about a sore in my mouth (upper jaw, not at the tooth area but up further) that has been hurting quite a bit for 2 months. I've treated it with mouth wash and oil pulling twice a day so it is bearable. He checked it out and told me that I have a receding gumline up there which is a side effect of chemo. You can see the bone a tiny bit. LOVELY. That'll cost some money to fix and be painful sometime in the future... For now, no infection so "rinse rinse rinse" as he said. Not smart to deal with this with a dentist for the time being since I still have chemo coming and healing isn't good while on chemo for anything in the mouth.
I also broached the topic of going to a different radiologist since I think mine isn't such a wonderful human nor do I have as much confidence in him after his statement that chemotherapy doesn't work with my type of cancer. My oncologist talked me down off the ledge with his kind words. He said many things: "We don't want to go off course, I know this is what you need right now." "He is just covering himself." "You can't teach an old dog new tricks." "We've seen the test results, the chemotherapy has worked and you need radiation next." "He's best at what he does and has already taken care of you twice." Hmm. So, I'm getting over anger (I know it isn't healthy anyways) and refocusing on the fact that I don't have to see the radiologist much at all over this course of treatment even though it is 6 weeks. Once he analyzes and sets things up, it is up to the tech people there. And I like and trust them. A lot.
My son and I chatted about the radiation treatment and I asked him if he wanted to wait at the hospital sometimes on days he would normally ride the bus home with me after an after-school activity. He bluntly answered that he'd prefer to not be at the hospital. Love my kiddo. So glad that he communicates his comforts. (Grateful I have other ways for him to get home as well.)
The last round of chemo today was only one drug but getting it in initially wasn't fun. (Yes, when is chemo fun anyways? NEVER.) The nurse started on my left hand and couldn't get the needle in the vein properly (OW OW OW to a needle being twisted, turned and tipped while in my wrist) then she switched to the right hand, phew... no bruising afterwards from either. I really appreciate the nurse, she felt terrible that I was in any pain and so sweet... good to finish off this round with her, gentlest touch and great chatter as well.
My lovely friend who came to my treatment today was able to distract me well and we discussed our libraries, books, lesson ideas, life, etc... felt inspired and happy, plus we got to a bookstore which is a happy place for both of us.
Appreciated the work week. Projects and thinking and teaching and more. Told my acupuncturist on Thursday that I taught 7 classes that day and he was so puzzled. "I thought you were a librarian..." My response: "I'm a TEACHER librarian, I teach about literacy, the research process, and technology. I teach full time at a primary school with 700 students and enjoy every minute..." He asked further questions, nice to educate another person about teacher librarians and move them beyond the book reading/loaning, bon bon eating librarian assumption...
Other distractions recently...
Last weekend my family went and saw The Hobbit 3- enjoyed and good to finish the trilogy. This weekend we went to see The Night at the Museum 3- enjoyed but heart-broken thinking about seeing Robin Williams in one of his last roles.

My husband and I recently watched other movies, recommend both: (Title links just bring you to IMDB info page.)
First: a witty French flick, hilarious lines, we both laughed aloud and recommend... there was one flaw we thought but were able to look past it **Not for faint of heart at cultural misunderstandings and jokes, watch the trailer... we appreciated every bit but some people could be offended:

Serial (Bad) Weddings: 

Second: What If - romantic drama- enjoyed it but a little cliche at the end... overall we enjoyed this one. I personally loved the art and animation connections.

What If:

So, there are two random movie recommendations... Hope everyone is having a wonderful beginning to their new year. Thanks for journeying with me...

Surgery and Guardians of the Universe

Over the weekend thoughts:
Warning to parents who are dealing with cancer in anyway, if you want to avoid violence, or if you don't want to expose your child to swearing, look out for this movie. I enjoyed it overall. My kiddo enjoyed it overall. But at the beginning of the movie there was a opening scene with a little boy at the hospital with his mom dying of cancer. (She looked terrible...) My little guy leaned over during a part of the scene where there was a close up on the dying mom and asked "Mommy, will you look like that?" I whispered back, "I don't expect it." Sigh... Hard part of the day but he didn't say anything else and just enjoyed the film.

Waiting is hard. The surgeon postponed the appointment for a day. Glad to get into talk.

We talked for 50 minutes with him.

He was very positive and confident.

I walked away feeling ok. Not thrilled of course with any of this but ok. 

So, here's the deal... I have a mass- infiltration by lymphoepithelioma-like carcinoma in my right lower lung. It is non-small cell lung cancer.

I also have a growth on my lymph nodes.

He believes he can operate and remove both.

He would cut on my right side in three places- one for the surgery, one for removal of lobe of lung and lymph nodes, and one for camera.

I would have a video assistant thoracoscopic surgery.

He would remove my complete right lower lobe of my lung- there are 3 parts to the lung. He would also take out all the lymphatic and adjacent lymph nodes. 

The day before the surgery I would need to check in during daytime hours and do a lung function objective test. It would be at the hospital where I've had most of the other operations and radiation treatment. 

I would be checked in and need to spend the night at the hospital and then the next day would be the operation.

The risks: 

There are risks since this is a major operation and invasive.

1. I could get a wound infection.

2. I could get pneumonia or some other type of chest infection.

3. I could have bleeding since he is cutting through many blood vessels to remove the lobe of the lung.

4. I could have an airleak from the lung recession.

5. I could have lymph node leaks.

I would have pain but it would be under Dr. control with medication.

Recovery time- with my age, he expects me to quickly recover.

The day after the surgery he'd have me sit up.

The day following that he'd want me up and walking around.

He thinks I might even have better lung capacity after a year than I do now with the exercises he'll prescribe afterwards, etc.

He would keep massage devices on my legs for at least two days to avoid deep vein thrombosis in the legs... also they'd be on there during the surgery.

I would need to stay in the hospital for around five days.

I would need around 4 weeks to fully recover.

After 3 weeks, he would expect me to begin chemotherapy. Chemo cycles might be once every 3 weeks for 4 times. Chemo treatment all depends on assessing the removed lung/lymph nodes and after evaluating them, they can classify the stage of cancer I'm at... although my other dr. already said I am at stage 3 since it is in my lymph nodes.

He expects to do the surgery next week mid week- maybe Wed or Thurs.

Breathing a little easier (hah) since I qualify for surgery. Can't believe I'm going thru this again. 

Shall just enjoy the week ahead as much as I can...